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. Q: What do you call a brunette with a blonde on either side? A: An interpreter.

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. A blonde from California decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety. Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground over and over. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune . . . the Supermarket manager sees her and shuts the horse off.

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. A blonde was playing Trivia Pursuit and was asked if she was in a vacuum and someone called out her name, would she hear it? She thought and answered.."is it on or off?"

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. Trish: My tummy is getting awfully big, doctor. Doctor: You should diet. Trish: Really? What color?

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. What the difference between a brunette and the trash? The trash gets taken out once a week!

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. A blonde and a brunette are taking a walk, and the burnette goes, "Oh look, a dead bird," and the blonde looks up at the sky and goes, "Where?"

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. Did you hear about the blonde that stared at an orange juice can for 20 minutes because it said concentrate?

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. How can you tell if a blonde stuffs her bra? They'll be sqaure because they forget to take the Klennex out of the box.

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. Q: How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies? A: 30 - 1 to make the batter and 29 to peel the smarties.

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. When blondes have more fun, do they know it?

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. Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes in a basement? A: A whine cellar

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. Santa, a dumb blonde and a smart blonde ran a race. Who won? Santa flys, not runs, there aren't any smart blondes, so the dumb blonde it must be!

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. There were two blonds on their way to Disney World. When they were getting close there was a sign that read, "DISNEY WORLD LEFT," So they turned around and went home.

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. Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? A: "Thanks for the refill!"

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. Q: What did the blonde do when she locked her keys in her car? A: She had to break a window to get out!

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. Q: What do you call a smart blond? A: A golden retriever!

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. Q: What's the blonde's cheer? A: "I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B. L. O. N. . . . ah, oh well. . I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea. . . "

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. What is chemistry's greatest achievement ...... Artificial blondes!

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. Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies? A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

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. A blonde, a redhead and a brunette all jump off a cliff. Which one hit the bottom first? Not the blonde, she needed directions!

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. Q: Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat? A: In case she locks the keys in her car.

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. Q: Why did the blonde wear condoms on her ears? A: So she wouldn't get Hearing Aids.

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. How do you make a blonde go crazy? Place them in a round room, and tell them to stand in the corner!

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. Q: What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A: The 1984 Hide and Seek World Champion.

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. Q: Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month? A: Because it says right on it "good for up to 20 pounds."

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. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? A: You only have to punch information into a computer once!

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. Q: Why do all blondes all have a dimple on their chin and a flat forehead? A: Finger on chin-I don't know. Hits forehead-Oh I get it!

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. Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and goes, "Why?"

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. Grow your own dope! Plant a blonde!

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. Q: Why don't blondes double their recipes? A: The oven doesn't go to 700 degrees.

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. Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch? A: To turn the blinker off.

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. What do you call a blonde behind a stearingwheel? An airbag!

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. Q: How do you drown a blonde? A: Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

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. Q: How do you recognize a blonde at the airport? A: She's the one throwing bread at the airplanes.

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. Q: Why did the Blonde girl stand in front of a mirror with her eyes closed? A: So she could see what she looks like asleep.

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. Q: What's a blonde's favorite wine? A: "Daaaddy, I want to go to Miaaami!"

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. Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head? A: A Space Invader.

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. Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a good cook? A: She gets the pop tarts out of the toaster in one piece.

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. Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick? A: Because red means stop.

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. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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. What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run like hell cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

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. Q: What is the definition of gross ignorance? A: 144 blondes.

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. Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up? A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.

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. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted!

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. To cut off a blonde's ears, put razor blades on each shoulder and ask the blond a question. Automatically the blonde will shake her head from shoulder to shoulder saying "I don't know."

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. Q: How did the blonde die ice fishing? A: She was run over by the Zambonis machine.

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. Q: What do you call 15 blondes in a circle? A: A dope ring.

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. Q: What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? A: Frosted Flakes.

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. Q: What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? A: Proof reading.

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. A blonde and a brunette jumped off a bridge, who landed in the water first? The brunette. The blonde had to stop and ask for directions.

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