Losowy
- Do Apes kiss? Yes, but never on the first date!1
- How come the giant Ape climbed up the side of 2
- How did a Gorilla come to be with Washington a3
- How did Gertie Gorilla make the 'Playboy' Cale4
- How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest?5
- How did the dog warn its master that a Gorilla6
- How did the obscene telephone caller get attac7
- How do we know that Apes are like fish after a8
- How do you make a Gorilla float? Two scoops of 9
- How do you make a Gorilla laugh? Tell it an e10
- How do you make a Gorilla stew? You keep it wai11
- How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your sta12
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| Kategoria SMS- 0 |
Losowy SMS: At the first session of a conversion class the minister conducting the class asked, "What must we do before we can expect forgiveness from sin?" After a long silence, one of the men in attendance raised his hand and said: "Sin?" 1. What's the difference between Windows
95 and a
virus?
A virus does something. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 83 2. Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red
light. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(): 113 3. What's the difference
between Windows 95 and a virus?
A virus does something. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 83 4. Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red
light. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(): 113 5. The officer shouted
orders to a
nearby soldier. With considerable bravery, the GI ran
directly onto
the field of battle, in the line of fire, to retrieve a
dispatch
case from a dead soldier. In a hail of bullets, he dove back to
safety.
"Private," the officer said, "I'm recommending you for a
medal. You
risked your life to save the locations of our secret
warehouses."
"Warehouses?" the private shouted. "I thought you said
whorehouses!" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(officer): 471 6. "I was married 3 times" explained
the man to a newly discovered
drinking partner, "and I'll never
marry again. My first 2 wives died
of eating poison mushrooms and my
3rd wife died of a fractured skull."
"That's a shame." said his
friend , "How did it happen?"
"She wouldn't eat the
mushrooms!" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(i): 316 7. What's the speed limit of
sex?
68; at 69 you have to turn around. Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(the): 68 8. What did the egg say to the
boiling water?
"How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got
laid a minute
ago." Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(did): 126 9. A ragged individual stranded for several months
on a small desert island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean one day
noticed a bottle lying in the sand with a piece of paper in it.
Rushing to
the bottle, he pulled out the cork and with shaking hands
withdrew the
message.
"Due to lack of maintenance," he read,
"we regretfully have found it
necessary to cancel your e-mail
account." Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(ragged): 407 10. This customer comes into
the computer
store. "I'm looking for a mystery Adventure Game with
lots of graphics.
You know, something really challenging."
"Well," replied the
clerk, "Have you tried Windows 98?" Prześlij na email | Liczba znaków(customer): 220 1 |
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Kot Kubuś wróci do tyskiej biblioteki!
Prezydent Tychów nie ma nic przeciwko temu, żeby Kubuś dalej mieszkał w miejskiej bibliotece. Jest więc duża szansa, że kot wróci na swoją półkę z książkami filozoficznymi
Wirtualny sklep i prawdziwe oszustwo
- 15 lat pracowałem na dobre imię mojej firmy a teraz ktoś wykorzystuje jej dane - mówi Andrzej Kuryłowicz, właściciel warszawskiego wydawnictwa „Albatros”. On i pracownicy od dwóch dni odbierają telefony od zainteresowanych kupnem sprzętu elektronicznego, którzy złożyli zamówienie na stronie internetowej www.1rtv.pl. Ktoś otwierając wirtualny sklep podszył się pod wydawnictwo Kuryłowicza.
Politycy PiS zapowiadają: Do TVN wrócimy
Po utracie <a href="http://tematy.wyborcza.pl/T/1628,TVP">TVP</a> polityków partii Jarosława Kaczyńskiego ciągnie do bojkotowanej od lipca <a href="http://tematy.wyborcza.pl/T/1638,TVN">TVN</a> i TVN 24.
Platforma zliberalizuje ustawę Gowina?
Zapłodnienie in vitro bez obowiązkowych badań genetycznych dla par i ograniczeń wiekowych dla kobiet, dostępne również dla związków nieformalnych - tak może wyglądać projekt ustawy bioetycznej autorstwa klubu PO
Losowy
- The brain is a wonder ful thing
Why do you
say 1
- Be sure that you go
straight home after
school2
- Playing truant from school
is like a credit
ca3
- Laugh and the class laughs with you.
But you
ge4
- Teacher: Where is the English Channel
?
Pupil: 5
- Teacher: Why does the
statue of liberty
stand 6
- Teacher: Give me three reasons
why the
world i7
- Teacher:
Are you good at math ?
Pupil:
Yes an8
- Teacher: What's 2 and 2
Pupil:
4
Teacher: That9
- Teacher: How much is half of 8
Pupil: Up and
do10
- The
teacher was reviewing counting with her
fi11
- Teacher:
Can you count to 10?
Fred: Yes,
teac12
- Teacher: If I lay one egg here and another
the13
- TEACHER: Jackie, take 932 from 1,439. What is
14
- Fred: I've
added these figures ten times.
Te15
Statystyki
Osób on-line: 1.
Smsów:
11900 / 11900
- What did the mother snake say to her
crying
ba1
- What's the best thing about deadly snakes ?
Th2
- Why did the python do national service ?
He
wa3
- What's a snakes favourite flower ?
Coily-flowe4
- What song to snakes like to sing ?
Viva
Aspana5
- What happened when a deadly rattle snake bit a
w6
- Why did the viper, viper nose ?
Because the
ad7
- What did the snake say when
another asked
him 8
- What do you give a sick snake ?
Asp-rin !9
- What do you call a snake who works for the
gover10
- What kind of letters did the snake get from his
11
- What's long, green and goes hith ?
A snake
wit12
- "So glad to meet you" said the Hindu politely
13
- What do you get if
crossed a new born snake
wi14
- Why did some snakes disobey Noah when he said
15
- Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking
I'm a
python.
16
- What do you get if you cross a glow-worm with a
17
- Why did
the viper want to become a python?
H18
- What do you get if you cross two snakes with a
19
- Did you hear about the stupid snake?
He lost
h20
News
Politycy PiS zapowiadają: Do TVN wrócimy
Po utracie <a href="http://tematy.wyborcza.pl/T/1628,TVP">TVP</a> polityków partii Jarosława Kaczyńskiego ciągnie do bojkotowanej od lipca <a href="http://tematy.wyborcza.pl/T/1638,TVN">TVN</a> i TVN 24.
Platforma zliberalizuje ustawę Gowina?
Zapłodnienie in vitro bez obowiązkowych badań genetycznych dla par i ograniczeń wiekowych dla kobiet, dostępne również dla związków nieformalnych - tak może wyglądać projekt ustawy bioetycznej autorstwa klubu PO
Owsiak do TVP: Oddajcie nam 38 minut
Nie wiadomo, ile z XVII finału Wielkiej Orkiestry Świątecznej Pomocy pokaże <a href="http://tematy.wyborcza.pl/T/1628,TVP">TVP</a> 2.
Wielka próba sił w SLD
Grzegorz Napieralski nie chce już usuwać Wojciecha Olejniczaka z szefostwa klubu parlamentarnego Lewicy. Zamierza go „zdyscyplinować”.
Atrakcyjny Kazimierz
W Krakowie wyznaniowa gmina żydowska walczy o zwrot mienia, które dziś służy... świeckiemu Centrum Kultury Żydowskiej. Za część nieruchomości dostała już odszkodowanie, teraz walczy z miastem o działkę.
Powrót Trzech Króli
Dziś, w Święto Trzech Króli, do marszałka Sejmu ponownie trafi obywatelski projekt ustawy o ustanowieniu 6 stycznia dniem wolnym od pracy.